Rainy Night

I am enjoying this rainy day and night.  On rainy days I love to lounge around and not really do anything.  Of course on days like this, my sweet Livia dominates my mind.  I spent the day working on my Masters projects and playing with my children.  I love that.  My son was so snuggly today.  He isn't snuggly much anymore now that he is almost 15 months so I will soak that in as much as I can.  I held him and thought about my Liv.  I see so much of her in both my children.  My heart was more joyful today thinking about her.  I ached for a while but I mostly thought about the days I was snuggling her and it brought a smile to my face.  Anything I think of to do for her in mind is not grand enough.  I could fill up an olympic stadium with people to remember her and that still wouldn't be enough.  I could build monuments in her honor and dedicate buildings but that still isn't enough.  Such a sweet, innocent soul that blessed our lives for such a short time.  What a gorgeous angel she must be.  I wish she would come and visit me in my dreams.  I know she is all around me all the time but I want to see her.  I want to see her in a way that is not a vision of that horrible night.  One day I will, I know it.